Saturday, October 22, 2011

The final chapter in the saga of my license!

I think a driving license in Dubai and me are a bizarre connection or basically I am paying for my past sins! Read, terrible language usage :-)

Took my second road test on Thursday. Strangely enough the one other lady who was to appear for the test, decided not to, so it was just my nemesis, a chinese lady and me in the car!

She looks at my learning permit, and as I am about to exit the parking, yells stop! I brake, wondering what was it that I was about to hit, mentally ticking one negative on her chart - brakes suddenly, does not observe - oh heck! Remembering my last test, I reach for the hazard lights when she negates that with a dismissive shake of her head. I breathe a sigh of relief! I am safe, hopefully..

"Is this your permit?", she asks narrowing her eyes, as she looks me up and down rather carefully.

"Huh?' I am completely foxed, wondering if she's lost it. She just took my driving test last week with the same permit and signed it as well. I am convinced, by the way, that she signed it only to remind her that I had done something to offend her (remember the expletive) cos as per driving instructor, the assessors usually sign only the assessment sheet and not the permit.

"Is this your photograph or your sister's?" she asks again, shaking her head at my lack of response.

'Huh?" I am convinced that one of us has lost it and am pretty sure its not me, "I don't have a sister in Dubai."

"Your daughter?" she asks piercingly, trying to look through my pretense, if any.

"Daughter?" now I am seriously offended. Either she seriously thinks the me in the photo was my daughter or she was being offensive. In which case it was working, I was starting to feel a tad offended! "No, that's my photograph".

"I am sorry but I cannot take test. I need to check identity" she starts to get out of the car. I am convinced this is God's way of punishing me for some thing that I had done. Then she thought better of it and sat back, 'do you have any identity with you?"

I fumble in my bag and fish out my passport and hand it to her, willing to throttle someone, anyone.. I can't go through the waiting agony of yet another road test :-(

"Hmm..." she mumbles as she checks my passport against the learning permit. "You've become fat" she pronounces as she closes the passport and hands it back to me.

I am not sure if I want to tell her "yes, thank you I am painfully aware of the fact" or clobber her for her frank observations, lol!  Political correctness? Hah, what animal is that?


While I am still wondering she follows it with "you were so pretty, why did you become fat?" I am still struggling to find a suitable retort to that when "I think you should loose weight. Not to look good but its very important for health". While I absorb that homily, she asks me to start. She is actually quite chatty and tells me that last week a mother & daughter duo registered with the school, tried to swap places with the mother trying to take the daughter's test. Terrible I agree, but I am still smarting at the thought of a 1 year old photograph being thought of as my daughter!

Clearly, wake up call - I need to have a good look in the mirror, and do something about my weight! Or most importantly time to get rid of that lying mirror - farewell good friend!


Though I am not sure if she has a good memory and was getting back at me for last time :-) - if indeed that, then game, set and match to her!

But despite all of that excitement and confusion, I did pass my driving test, and she actually smiled at me and told me I was very good! While I am still smarting fro her rather candid observations, I am a much relieved holder of a driver license!


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